Do you ever feel a sense of longing?

I’m sure I’m not the only mother alive who has fantasized about just chucking it all and walking away, starting a new life in a new town. Remember that Anne Tyler book (I think it’s Ladder of Years) in which a middle-aged mom actually does it. She just walks into a new town and buys herself some pretty new dresses, rents an apartment, gets herself a job and carries on a new life. I read this book before I had kids and the whole time, I’m hoping against hope that the kids and her husband never find her, that she never has to return to her old life filled with dirty socks and sarcastic remarks. Fast forward about 12 years: I’m married to my best friend, and I have three kids who treat me with respect. They put on their own shoes, buckle...

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Silent affirmations to use when you don’t feel very loving

There are moments in this life, particularly around the holiday dinner table, in which one must forgive in the moment. Moments in which one must come up with every possible way of softening, of seeing the loveliness and the light and the Christ in the person sitting across the table, even if there are no things that you can see, in the moment, as lovely or light-filled. These are the silent affirmations I have been using. Sometimes they even work. My favorite are Don Miguel Ruiz’s Four Agreements, which are so wise and helpful that I am tempted to get them tattooed on my palm — permanent crib notes for the game of life. 1. “Be impeccable with your word.” 2. “Don’t take anything personally.” 3. “Don’t make...

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